so this guy comes in from the patio covered in puke and says "we gotta go"...Yup u need to go is an understatement
can i drink enough to forget this semester even happened?
God, i just love slightly insecure guys with hearts of gold and giant penises.
She said i saw her in the study room, waved, disappeared, came back with a coke from god knows where, and slurred "i have a drinking problem but i ate grits"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i wasn't going to tell her about the threesome but i had to explain the tree and the green paint everywhere
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
What happens at the gay bar stays at the gay bar. Except that I sold my panties for $100. People should know that.
In other news, people don't judge you when you buy a vibrator if you buy a funny birthday card and bag with it. I learned that this weekend.
That's not fair! You can't come over after you just had sex and rub my dry spell in my face!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just realized Ive never seen my f buddy in the daylight. What if he looks different?
You can not love someone based on who they were when they were 9. Does he know how many dicks I've sucked since then?
I am buying anal lube, an enema, and a bag of kit kats. What part of this is compelling the Walgreens woman to tell me to "be well".
You know you're gay when you have to have your coworkers explain to you why your bracket is terrible
I put on that one song on Titanic so he'd fall asleep. When I was positive he'd passed out in a drunken fit, he outstretches his arms and says "I'm flying, Jack.."
I woke up spooning with two strangers on Saturday morning... I felt like a sexual sandwich
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