he kept farting in my kitchen and blaming it on the dog. then we went to wendy's and he spent twenty minutes in the bathroom. im pretty sure he shit his pants.
you should have known when you found out he drove a mini cooper not to hang out with him.
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
When I came in she was screaming "boundaries!" at the cat because it was trying to eat her pizza rolls.
In class ... We were just assigned groups for the quarter... Remember that night we took shots from that guys pants? I now know his name
drunk doesnt even begin to explain it. he said he was going to get playing cards from the lobby and came back 20 minutes later with a full set of sheets.
I'm Still in a robe trying to piece together 3-7am I'll be there in a few
Honestly... isn't she a psych major? how does she go through life NOT realizing that everything she does is a cry for help?
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
When I was leaving this morning he gave me some candy off his floor to prove he was a nice guy... He definitely knows the way to my heart. Best one night stand ever
I'm covered in European cum. How's your day going?
Remember how he wouldn't sleep with me "out of respect"? Well, Mr. Respect just fingered me in a parking garage.
But in defense of this shit summer we've had, I totally perfected my shotgunning skills. I have achieved my summer goal.
Totally thought something squeezed my boob. Then I remembered I was wearing a bra. Isn't weed great?
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO BE A DRUNK WHEN ALL MY ENABLERS ARE BUSY?!
She and I had some intense sexual tension earlier when she dumped a package of apple straws all over my body.
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