I've rolled joints bigger than that penis.
wait, do i give off the impression that i DON'T want girls to show me their boobs if i video chat with them?
Remember when the only STD we had to worry about were hickies? Those were the days
a cemetary is a place for people to rest in peace and you just spermed all over their land
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's sitting on the couch buck naked, eating a cupcake for dinner. I'm breaking new ground as a parent here.
I understand. Hypothetically what should one do after throwing up in the shower?
Do you remember giving me altiods and wishing me good luck on the walk home?
plan d- we get drunk, go see that Justin Bieber movie and freak out 13 year old girls.
My ex best friend's ex fuck buddy is visiting. There was no other option but day drinking.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just had to pull out another loan to pay for that public drunkenness citation. I am so ready to graduate.
You fell asleep with your fingers in my vagina. You made this a relationship.
I told her the job opening requires being on the phone during the week and on my face on the weekends. I think she wants the job.
I did cocaine off my boobs last night. Then I wrote two essays and went on a run. Go me
All I need is a morbidly obese man masturbating at the other end of the car and I'll complete the CTA Horror Trifecta.
He ate me out on a washing machine in the 24 hour laundromat. Whoever watches that security camera footage is getting a show!
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