OK...I gotta go get strawberry short cake cakes and knee pads
If it makes you feel better he went down on me when i had a yeast infection.
Your ass just called me, someone was yelling "awful waffle" and also, " I don't know who's hands are who's anymore"
The fact that I found him in his Ninja Turtles t-shirt next to six empty and obviously consumed packs of EasyMac watching reruns of Becker certainly made telling him that I wanted a divorce so much easier than I had planned.
I like yr title more along "the hot Russian I have sex with."
at the end of the day, college isnt gonna be for everyone... and some of us are just going to have to learn how to breathe underwater while sucking cock.
well, obviously he didn't fuck me for my strong moral fiber.
Life Epiphany- I need to have children so I can be the drunk grandma at family functions. Its my destiny.
Seeing your one night stand on campus never gets less awkward. Why is Subway the only good place to eat?
I'm going to start charging you rent if you keep leaving your random conquests on my living room couch the morning after
Well. Now I feel like I put pants on for nothing.
day drinking caused me to be in bed at a decent time. can't complain.
I AM STRANGELY AROUSED BY THIS UNEXPECTED DEVELOPMENT AND I AM COMPLETELY OK WITH THIS.
She can be as judgemental as she wants. But she thinks the female orgasm is a myth so who is really winning here...
The night they met I slept with both of them. Of course I'm best man.
Randomize
