Tell him to shut up cuz i said so. I lost my dollar shoe :(
Theyr drawing diagrams to try to explain to me how high they are
Thanks to this cookie, I have now eaten something other than skittles today.
Every fourth of July I get sentimental when I think back to the one where we drove around baked off our asses crashing multiple cookouts listening to Team America's "America, Fuck Yea" on repeat. I miss us.
I mean it's my life so what if i want to drink Molson from my sparkly shoes and not regret anything
Found out last night that "Everclear" is Spanish for "shit got weird"...
He just got here and all he's wearing is a cloth over his penis.
I'll uninvite my mom
That man deserves a slow clap... He defied the power of the vagina
The bartender had to walk me home last night. New high or new low?
You've never felt ridiculous until you've walked through downtown in a Viking costume
he's the only real guy friend I've had who I've never made out with
No, no... It was great. I feel like my liver took a vodka shower and washed it's hair with pabst
so hungover. idk whos house or comp im on
Watching Colbert Report and porn at the same time.
Somehow my life has turned in to drug deals at the bar, and illegally camping on a mountain because I have no where else to live.
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