That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
I just hit a new low..poured my beer in an empty coke can so I could drink in walmart.
He said his penis was a 1 woman penis with a conscience an I was that woman...technically a declaration of commitment rite?
The nursing school interview showed me a picture of my passed out during your party. They asked if this was a frquent thing. I told them you drugged me.
She danced with a broom while telling me I was "cool as shit" and she "wishes she could take a portion of my big ass and attach it to hers" then she passed out
You pulled down your pants, pissed in the recliner, and wiped yourself with my utility bill. I thought it was in the worlds best interest to put you to bed.
I'm taking stock of m life as of right now and my Friday night plans are to drink a 30 rack by myself so I can have a tv stand when it is finished
After the Jell-o shots and about 6 shots of lighter fluid brand tequila, it got to the point where breathing was painful. All I could do was pray I didn't fall asleep in the front yard.
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
I just walked away from a youth soccer tournament popping every birth control pill I had left in the pack.
Three months into our sexual relationship, he comes out with "Your body is efficient". WTF do I do with THAT?
All I've done is masturbate and drink while being home from college.
New holiday tradition. Eat all the Xanax in the am, then wake up later after festivities and eat all the leftovers
immediately after sex he started talking to me about nerdy stuff he meant to text me earlier, I'm completely smitten
I realize ur driving andwont read this til u stop, but I'm sleeping in the bed of the pickup. Please don't hit a deer.
Randomize
