so was this before or after i puked down the ice luge?
she thought Martin Luther king was a president at one time. I love knowing I broke up with my ex and this is what he ends up dating.
She never called back. Financed a fleshlight.
who knew that if you vomit while skydiving the puke goes up towards the people that are behind you.
On that note; HAPPY 21: THE SEQUEL from the back of an ambulance!!
Tim said I dropped my taco in a puddle and still ate it.
i'm having flashbacks of crying and telling you i was made out of egg salad.
Don't use the things I tell you while drunk after the bruins won the cup against me
He told his ice cream cone it 'looked cute' and then started to cry. The Dairy Queen people were not pleased.
This isn't fair. Why can't sober me be good at bejeweled?
She kept throwing quarters at him and yelling "Goooaaallll!!" whilst taking her clothes off one by one. I'd say she had a good night
Why is there a chocalet milkshake outside our front door?
Alcohol
I think someone cast a spell on the lazy stoner rich boy stereotype and it came to life and called me.
I am certain that you would be a mere freckle on the behemoth of slutty that has taken place at this complex.
I had a date last night. His dog threw up in his bed while we were having sex in it.
Randomize
