ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
i'm in his phone as sushi coochie
So Delta doesn't take cash. I used my card to buy a drink and asked the attendant if she could leave it open.
There is NOTHING better than watching a child being chased by an ostrich.
the doctor brought back painful memories by lecturing me about your teeth marks that are still on my dick.
According to the bell hop, we stumbled in about 4 and then cannon balled into the pool.
He leaned over in the middle of the movie and said "My dick's name is Juan". WHO DOES THAT?
Found out it was only pneumonia. We celebrated hydrocodone cough syrup. Two long island ice teas at lunch and the random white powder we found in her purse. Mother of the year award.
The weekend is off to a good start: she just got into a verbal fight with a hobo. Nearly a fist fight.
passed out in the hallway last night, now I'm sitting down in the shower, eating lukewarm canned soup out of Tupperware, listening to Carly rae jepsen.. I had a rough night.
What we have is to special to throw away over a woman who spreads her butt cheeks on a pool table for me...
Immediately after I scarfed down an Applebee's appetizer trio for lunch, my boss sent me on an hour long road trip to pick up some parts. Great. I can't wait to shit my pants on US-31 South.
Then a third Canadian I didn't know showed up to the hotel room at like 3am. I let him sleep in our bed because he had pizza.
The power of my boobs compel you
Is it just me or is it like a girl gets married and all of a sudden she’s a “blogger”?
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