I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
I caved and texted him. But it's strictly drug dealing business so it doesn't count.
we screwed to my bar mtzvah tape, I became a man while watching myself becom a man
I am like king midas for the gay community. everything I touch turns into a lesbian.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
fuck he's narrating my life in a british voice make him stop im way too fucking high for this
Call me when you get up. This hang-over is like dismantling a bomb: I need someone to talk me through it.
My mouth feels like I've been chewing on leather and firecrackers for the past 3 days
Well, I had a dudes gf walk in on us the next morning but nothing during...She shook my hand after I got dressed and said "nice to meet you with your clothes on" best moment of my life.
Her dad high fived me on the way out the door. Not the reaction i expected after she came so loud.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I made him an O's fan. One pic of my tits coming out of a Baltimore shirt and it was done.
Ugh. I guess I'm crying loudly or something. My mom just came in and gave me milk, chocolate, a Xanax, and her weed "for the break up blues". Her ways of affection are so odd.
After seeing all of the pics during the trial, all I could think was "her vagina doesn't look THAT dangerous"
I'm calling in my "fuck at anytime anywhere" card. Meet me at my place in 20 min, wear your Waldo costume.
I just walked out topless, stared his brother straight in the eye, and ate all the rest of their cookie dough.
We fucked to Bonnie Tyler in my car. He's the one.
Randomize