Dear everyone that texted me last night wondering where i was. i ended up face down blacked up drunk before i made it to the party. My bad
I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
Don't know whats worst me sharding on her a bit or her believing me when i told her she did it...
I wanna be on tlc
Impossible. You are neither fat, fertile or fashionless.
If I die and they 'assume' it's natural causes, just go with it.
He walked in AS I was cumming. Now even my father knows I'm a squirter.
Your like the Mozart of blow jobs, you make every other girl seem like cheesy elevator music.
I filled two of the glass ornaments in my mom's bathroom last night with vodka. That way no one sees me drinking on Christmas. Alcoholic or genius? All I know it makes bathroom trips frequent and enjoyable.
My catholic guilt is strong, but the alcohol is stronger.
Atlanta road trip update. Jimmy fell into the petting tank at the aquarium. And freaked out. With cops now... Keep you posted
It's Been clinically proven that people who have sex 6 or more times per week are happier than those who don't. Just and FYI. For your mental health. From a soon so be psychologist. Who is drunk.
Blocking me on Facebook doesn't change the fact that you've had my penis in my mouth. So there's that.
well. can officially check "get caught having sex on the front porch by the neighbors" off the bucket list.
I'm not well. Although it could be worse.
My cousin is so hungover she quit her job.
Randomize