fuck, i think i'm broken. Alchyhol air mattress = the suck.
Bar closing I am hiding in the bathroom. do you think anyone will find me?
He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
my girlfriend just informed me I need to get tested and so do you
girlfriend?
It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
so does the 200 for rent and 150 for utilities include the never telling my boyfriend about the guys i bring home.. or is that extra?
I am never taking advice from you again. The high heels in the shower were a bad idea. I orgasmed and almost drowned.
Can you please tell him to stop calling me ma'am? I'm starting to remember what it's like to have self respect
So it turns out rose was the bear hunting girl. Fuck my life
None of those words made sense together.
I'm not sending you pictures to jack off to. That's not what friends do
And all you did was hit on me and do things "for America", so you weren't judged heavily
Look, if I'm too lazy to put any effort into sexting, you better believe I'm too lazy to put any effort into dating.
It is not if she takes a guy home Karaoke night. It is how many.
One of those days. Also, your pants are now in my protective custody.
aloe plants are like gummy bears with an exoskeleton, but with healing powers instead of deliciousness.
are you on the drugs???
Randomize
