It's 8:30am and I'm drinking.... this is a new low
i think i would be perfectly content if, on my deathbed, i could look back on a life that didn't have any fisting in it
I'm pregaming with America's Best Dance Crew.
Do a shot everytime Lil' Mama mispronounces a word.
When i woke up this morning she asked me 'when did you first find out that you could see the future.' I gotta stop drinking.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
dude, i think we just came across a situation where tits weren't worth it.
If I refrain from fucking my manager, I'm going to reward myself by fucking that guy from the photo department.
gay flight attendant. racoons. kegels. bartender with missing teeth. too many birthdays. fucckk.
Did you guys seriously let me trade my id for a kebab last night??
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Happy 420. I woke up to a girl smoking weed and dragging me out of bed. Chemistry makes so much sense high.
It's gay pride, I'm in my EMT uniform getting more girls than your straight ass ever will..
Well get back to your date and give him the ceremonial 1am handy and text me when your done.
It is not a successful senior year unless you show up to campus without pants at least once, right?
I feel like sleeping with foreign people is a long term investment. It's like a time share. Now when I go to London I have a place to stay.
I can’t tell if I have feelings for him or if my vagina does.
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