So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
no you're not listening to me HE WANTED TO BRAID MY HAIR
you know how they say when you die, your whole life flashed before you? well do you get to see what happened all the nights you blacked out?
he's having a long distance Facebook-coordinated power hour. the status update has 159 comments ...
I am pretty sure I told him the clouds were earth's purest filtration system and that snow was the rarest and most delicious water in the world. My lips are burning because we ate so much.
Even though ive seen her get fisted by another girl at a party, shes still a doctor.
Unlimited sex for unlimited netflix. I can deal with that. I think this is the first prostitution deal for netflix ever.
I think I'm getting too used to throwing up in the reception trash can. It doesn't even phase me anymore
He's still filling me in on the details. mid-table dance i asked to go water skiing?
Dude I walked in to my house just to be handed a bottle of vodka by my sister. She then said i had 15 minutes to finish it. Moving into my parents place is the best choice I have made this year.
So Monday we're lesbians.
Deal. This decision is final and any rebates on this will result in losing an eyeball.
Come now. I'm bloody but I'll give you the best fuck of your life.
The boys wrestled in the living room for the last condom while the girls chanted, "THE LAST MELON."
The toilet wouldn't flush at the club so I literally just shat in the garbage.
Have you ever had to act sober and talk to an authority figure in a coconut bra? Because it is just as degrading as you would imagine.
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