we have officially lost it.
how come the more i say "don't get it in my eyes," the more gets in my eyes
I feel like a really awesome person when i have to check my roof for things i've lost
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
Just seen a lady with the back of her head shaved and the rest of her hair in a pony tail like a sumo wrestler with a 6 inch glass dolphin hair clip. Nothing is going to ruin my day.
If we can't get laid at a bar crawl, we should just quit life.
I think my sunburn makes my ass look bigger
omg sorry but i tried to stop you when you were at your drunk limit but i took my eyes off you for like 2 seconds and you suddenly appeared with hard liquor in both hands for yourself and downed them and it was downhill from there
My life is literally "I'm too horny you can't leave" or "let's have pie" there's like no inbetween
I can't hangout tonight, I have a phone sex appointment at 10
i'm sitting in bed scratching my boobs and wearing a sparkly fedora and have no one to blame but myself
She can be as judgemental as she wants. But she thinks the female orgasm is a myth so who is really winning here...
Is it possible for mice to climb? If so I think mice are climbing into my bed in the night and playing with my hair..
its like i just tried to scrub the hangover off of me.
Why would you ask him if you could lick his chest?
He has a very lickable chest
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