It's hipsters with their motorcycle cop mustaches, moccasins, douchey irony, and department stores to supply their independent conformity
Something's gotta give!
Think about all of the events that have led to this: me sitting in the back of my classroom drinking beer out of a taco bell cup, telling the teacher I have to leave early to go to an AA meeting.
So Ive decided I have serious issues. Im walking around the school with a bag labeled booze money collecting from people while slightly hungover at 8:20 in the morning, and nobody is questioning me.
We planned for the zombie apocalypse. In great detail. Of course there was booze involved.
Were betting on little kids falling and racing for a drinking game at the wedding.
You just kept holding your breath for a really long time and calling it lung excersizes.
There's something odd about buying beer for the first time while wearing my school sweater from kindergarten, but I don't mind.
I vaguely remember having a 'grass is greener' conversation about our nipples. Dream or beautiful reality?
Beautiful, beautiful reality
It doesn't matter how many beers you've had, it's unacceptable to piss in someone's helmet after a playoff win.
All I know is that every time I looked at my glass it was full again and I thought it would be rude not to drink it
Nah I've been there. The worst you'll see is some hobo peeing in a sewer at 3 am on a Saturday
Finally get to put my practical writing degree to use! I'm writing a craigslist ad for a threesome
You know the rule about how you feel bad for getting food and not offering other people you're around, does that apply when you eat burger king at a strip club?
Thanks. I just smoked a bowl topless so I'm in heaven right now.
Say thank you and give him a blowjob.
Randomize
