Puking blue powerade in mcdonalds parking lot to the applause of the guy taking out the trash with man in the mirror blasting in the background. Good morning stl
I was sitting behind this girl in class and she logged out of her facebook, hacked into her boyfriends, and then proceeded to check his inbox. This is why I'm single.
OMG THIS GUYS LICENSE PLATE IS GETTNHRWET
nutella sex= disaster
I was dancing barefoot on glass at one point. That really sobered me up.
I think I should receive an honorary Heisman... I mean, I did sleep with two of the finalists
Saddest moment ever is discovering when your cat no longer wants to get high with you.
I feel like I just walked the hall of shame thru the marriott. Everyone stared.
I think it was the shoes and limping. Not the sex. I could b wrong.
Nothing says "Good Morning" like Jell-o shots and coffee cakes.
Debating whether the Plan B I had this morning would go under breakfast or lunch in my food log.
you were holding her above your head singing Circle of Life in what i assume was a Simba reference. then she smacked her head on a bar light and the bouncers kicked you out
I woke up on a boat next to an extremely attractive man wearing nothing but a life jacket. Neither one of us owns a boat...
Dick. I'll go round and break his windows. I've been watching Sons of Anarchy on Netflix.
I just threw up in front of a bunch of parents/prospective students while they were on a campus tour..awesome..
you drug him to get him horny then deny him sex. freaks.
Randomize
