What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
How wet are you?
Ever heard of a U-boat?
in jail i did the beyonce ass shake for the police officers & called Sally from my collect phone in my cell & started singing "im in JAAAIL IM IN JAAAIL",
and I didnt even know his name until this morning when we were laying in bed and he referred to himself in the 3rd person.
she requested me as her brother on facebook.... biggest. letdown. ever.
Dude, the cops never think it's as funny as you do.
Overall win. We all know who got to sleep on the concrete outside of Denny's with you.
I take pleasure in knowing how many gallons of booze we've put away in comradery.
I think we should measure in "bathtubs"
Yo plow her in the living room were all outside tommy wants to see
Alright, text me when you get close. I've got a mustache and I'm ready to get my day drunk on.
He pulled a kid having a seizure out of a car and stayed with him until the ambulance came.
he what???
Not kidding. My ovaries cannot handle this shit...swear next time he'll rescue a bunch of pound puppies and hand them out to lonely orphans.
Technically, I traded a soft pretzel for sex last night...
He has great taste in girls. I feel closer to my Eskimo sisters than my real sister...
It's beautiful and huge. Like a dinosaur.
OHMYGOD YOU REALLY THINK I'D BE ON OPRAH?!
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