the fundamentals of my vasectemy are strong
I saw your purple underwear in the road this morning.
i bet even starving children in Africa take the crust off their poptarts
She gave me a blow job and her mom gave me blueberry muffin afterwards. I love them.
cliffnotes. writing studyguide on last pack of smokes. glad this semester is over.
Well, at first I was really confused. But then I realized that he was talking from his penis's perspective... in third person.
Like I had no idea he knew how to play girls the way he played me. His major is chemistry for christ's sake.
If is anything like my past relationships, I have no doubt that I will single-handedly reignite the Cold War
Idk. It's not appealing to me. Like don't get me wrong, I love ur dick A LOT but I don't want to stare at it on an iPhone screen
Just recreated a sandwich from the caf in my own kitchen. Graduation denial at it's finest.
You fell asleep mid blowjob with my vibrator in your HAND. So no, I will not bring you pizza.
Jesus when did you leave my house? I found 2 bottles of wine, vodka, and a book with blow all over it wondering if I was read bedtime stories
I'm too pretty to be this sexually frustrated.
My orgasm happened in two different decades
hey i'm sure you are probably asleep bc you suck and think sleep is necessary to live or something?
Randomize
