U know its gonna be a great day when the guy at the liquor store waves at u cause u walked by
i just stumbled downstairs, still drunk, to hug my dad and wish him a happy fathers day
but fathers day is next sunday
i realized that after i threw up on his bare feet
Okay call me later ill be watching lifetime and scrubbing throw up off my feet
I feel like a combination of david goes to the dentist and drunkest guy ever goes for more beer
We pinky-swore to never fuck each other again.
I cant talk about it right now or let you guess, but its something you and i would do. Kinda like that time we had the case of beer and went bowling
You hooked up with minors in a golf cart?
I think the pivotal moment was when we used the see and say as a drinking game with shots of whiskey. It was all downhill after that.
Dude you couldnt even talk, you just kept hiccuping and slamming your head on the wall.
Will do. If it all falls thru I'm just gonna set up a sprinkler in my back yard and run thru it while taking jello shots. Perfect alternative to my 29th bday.
He stopped responding after the animal pictures... I do this EVERY TIME.
Forgot to tell you--the bartender at Crowbar set his arm on fire last night. He was doing this "Cocktail" bartender trick of pouring alcohol that was on fire between glasses. Then some leaked out, onto his arm, and set his arm on fire, then his shirt. Exciting! (And he's ok).
I don't know, I kept pretending that I was riding an elephant during. It was actually really fun, but you can't tell him that!
If you wake up with half a an eyebrow.... I'm pretty sure it was a good time.
It's alright. I'm just trying to make her realize you're not good enough for her.
fuck st louis. fuck their hockey. fuck their basball. fuck their football if they still got it. fuck their tiddlywinks teamm. fuck their ribs. fuck their entire city. what im trying to say is i dont like st louis
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