I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
Which one of you FUCKERS filled the toilet with soil and planted my mothers daisys in it? NOT FUCKING HAPPY
I don't know what's more pathetic, the fact that you dated him or the fact that it took a Taylor Swift song for you to break up with him.
i just woke up to 15 people singing a whole new world
Worst night here by far. And ive slipped in my own piss so thats saying something
It's home.......I'm going to the store in disguise to get skittles and cake frosting. Then I'll eat the frosting in a dark corner while I cry and wonder what I did to deserve this.
I remember you licked my face and said that's all you're getting
He's my BOYFRIEND but he won't sext me. I'll be like, "tell me how you want to fuck me", and he's like, "I love how we can talk about our feelings". FUCK
It's amazing to think about how many Obama victory sex babies are being prevented by Obamacare free contraception.
It was a "my chaser needed a chaser" kind of night
you slapped the bag of goldfish out of her hands and screamed, "BITCH THIS AINT NO AQUARIUM". That's how fucked up
Rumor has it that you want to bring me soup in exchange for a blow job.
I took an uber home at 6am. Went to Santanas, apparently they don't take american express. So the uber driver bought my burrito. Success!
so... i have a picture of you and three other girls making kissy faces at this giant stuffed banana you're holding. however, you seem to be violently screaming at it.
Those bitches did NOT have my back.
I woke up with a jacket; in it passport, hockey tickets, sunglasses, credit card, bank transactions
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