textsfromlastnight.com keeps rejecting me
that alone proves you never get laid, nor have a life.. or have anything funny to contribute to the world.
I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
I just told a dude I hooked up with last night he was the pick of the litter.
So apparently when he was telling people he was in Alaska for 6 months he was actually in jail
i'm calling it girls night to make myself feel better but lets be real.....i wasn't going to get any guys tonight regardless
He gets a blow job; I get my oil changed free of charge. And that way I only see him every 2500 miles.
for breakfast I had vodka and flavor blasted goldfish. and I'm topless.
Well it's official, last night I hooked up with the third girl from the apartment downstairs.
Dude that's a hat trick!
I know, I tossed my hat on the floor as I was walking out.
Also, I cannot stop picturing myself in a bar, 3 years from now ordering soda. Just soda. 30 pounds over weight and wearing a cat sweater. I feel like I'm heading in the wrong direction in life.
I just quit my job so I could get dick this weekend. I'm pretty sure my need for dick is much more important than the customers' needs.
I still can't get the taste of her nipples and the udon noodles out of my mouth
It's simple. He fucks me at his place and I fuck him at my place. It's like man of the house gets to top.
Wait an hour then go and untie him. Bring toilet paper and some spare underwear. Want anything from Starbucks?
Randomize
