and she was petting her beer can
Reggie can tackle my bush.
I just puked in my fish tank. Helloooooo summer.
if you're passed out when i get there i get to wear your banana costume and do awful things to you
First coke bust down the road. Spring is finally here.
You blackout rapped the entire DMX song Party Up last night at karaoke without looking at the screen. Then you Tebowed on stage, hugged a black guy, puked in a garbage can, then left. You deserve a medal.
Apparently campus cops frown on lighting a joint off of the eternal flame on Jerry Falwell's grave...
At least I will not still be rolling when I pick up this animal. Thats a good development in five years
What kind of costume was that supposed to be??
I'm an orgasm trader!
Pants off. Spirits lifted.
I have decided that today will be all about indulgence and hedonism.
He called me in the middle of the night to ask my shoe size. Apparently big feet would make me an unsatisfactory third for the threesome.
Apparently today is power bottom appreciation day
No it's a real cult, with original ideas and shit like that
Its really awkward pooping while on videochat. Even if you turn the video off.
Randomize