He just posted pic of sad weiner and half a butt cheek. That is it. I HATE online dating.
I went with the blow up doll and I'm glad I did.
i had a headache and asked the kid next to me for aspirin. he gave me esctacy instead. gotta love college.
He tried to blame not having a condom on the economy.
waking up outside has become so normal, the paper boy knows to set the paper next to me
It's like there's a party and my mouth and everyone's throwing up
well i did drunkenly flip his snowmobile going 90, so i can kind of see why hes mad
Idea for the cake. Joints for candles. Do it.
I just horrified a large group of people. Congrats on dating me.
A client gave me a bottle of vodka today. And he was hot with a beard. It's like he knows my soul.
Join us. We're on the roof drinking breakfast
Just checked in with my friend who walked in on us. He thinks you two had a spiritual connection and he's bugging out
He was also rolling face on molly so his perception of divinity might be slightly off
Tinder in Coventry is like browsing a gallery of mugshots from Azkaban
How is it that on the one day I'm just moving my car at 6:30 I get the walk of shame looks but when I come home at 9 am in a torn dress holding heels old ladies smile at me?
Just so you know, it is really hard to rehydrate when everything is spiked with everclear.
Randomize
