i no longer even have beer goggles. i'm pretty sure i blacked out and had beer lasik.
they're making a venn diagram comparing gummi bears against gummi worms...is this what i have to sit thru to get free weed????
Fire inspection over. Blunts are OK
WHY AREWNT YOU HERE SO MUCH FUN STUFF DO IT GET IN CAR NOW caps lock
I'm tangled in a fishing net down at the harbor. This has nothing to do with Captain Morgan. Bring wirecutters.
Night. I'll wake u up at 6 with the unfinnished vodka bottle so be prepared young grasshoper. U have much to learn.
A sandwich with pizza as the bread. I love you.
YES WITH THE SQUARE KIND OF SLICES
When I found her she was drinking wine out of a plastic bag in a bathroom stall, staring at herself in the mirror and crying hysterically. Cabo does things to a person...
He led me to his room and handed me the remote, he left to go take a shower and there is a group of guys across the hall just staring at me... Its like they know something i dont. Help me.
The bad news is tonight is also a blue moon, ergo, latin, I will have to get 'once in a blue moon' drunk which I feel is significantly more dangerous than IPO drunk
This heat and humidity do not mix with these braless DDs and a tank top at a BBQ.
I've literally NEVER been on a date or gotten through one episode of netflix without having sex like I JUST WANT TO WATCH TRUE DETECTIVE
So this is what it's like to wake up with someone else's blood in your nose...
do I look like a person who has full control of their limbs and existence on this plane of reality
Just puked. First it was bright neon blue then it turned to bright lime green. How does that even happen? And wtf was I drinkin last night?
Randomize
