So she comes up to me at the end of the night and asks me if I going to take her home and fuck her. I pretty much had to right?
you had an obligation.
watchout when you come home, dougs at the top of the stairs naked eating doritos
I heard you were walking home with taylor with your dress completely up and your ass exposed
Yeah, that sounds like my life.
I'm going for high school drunk, you've got 15 minutes to get here.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Haha he's lucky I don't kick him back into the land of the majestic handjobs
Right now Tom has the 2nd floor office bathroom under siege. He shit/clogged one toilet, and he's throwing up in the sink.
I think my favorite day of the week is the day we get to fuck
It's a lube slip n slide down the hallway now. Details later.
Walking my dog and eating a taco in last night's dress.. Classy
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
But if I live with you I'll help pay rent. Only if you promise no 50 shades of what the fuck internet hookups
IN OTHER NEWS did you guys see Orlando Bloom's penis today? I did
He kept screaming "I am the thunder!" when he was riding me.
My sack is cleanly shaven and the rest of my body has been manscaped. i even put aftershave on my junk. i feel sleek like a fighter jet right now.
The prescription the hospital gave me for pain and nausea doubles for my hangovers... Maybe I'll hit up the ER more often
Did a 4 pm walk of GLORY the next day.
Randomize