YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
Did you read the article making fun of the right wing extremists? How they organized this 'tea party', and to propagate it they would mail teabags to their senators? And it became a verb...they had posters saying 'teabag obama!' yeah...
A message to Mrs Obama perhaps?
TXT her NOW! The phone is actually IN her Va-Jay-Jay!!
How young is too young to ask my kid to make me a drink?
So he passed out in the bathroom of the bar, woke up thinking he was somewhere else and called her flipping his shit because he thought she left him. She had to go into the men's bathroom to find him, and then he told her she was "trying too hard to be his girlfriend" over and over again.
Dont they live together now? Havent they been together for like two years?
Yeah. That's the best part. I always thought he was kind of a pussy but turns out he's a degenerate just like us. Welcome
i'm sending her a home depot gift card for the hole i put in her wall. call it good?
he told me it was because of the roids, but i couldn't tell if he meant ster or hem.
he asked you how you felt and you yelled "I FEEL SO PROACTIVE!" and started coloring with sharpies
Just put my hand under my pillow and found a peach ring. Lat night just came rushing back.
Best part of failing a semester of college: not having to buy books next semester. I can drink to that
I'm still not sure if it was intentional, but the chiropractor definitely cradled his balls on my shoulder. He even seemed to adjust the sack for comfort. I think I should be flattered. He is a doctor, after all..
By the way I got my period today. No NHL babies for me.
I should become a firefighter. Who uses his cock to fight fires. Like a Superhero.
I am at 99 matches in less than 24 hours, I need a tinder rehab program
His name was toto. That should have been my red flag
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