nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
btw, her name was actually Alixx. in retrospect, it was pretty much a gimme
Class is significantly more awkward when you know that your teacher knows what you look like with your legs behind your head... Just saying.
As I was driving her home she congratulated each and every deer we saw for making it through the first day of dear season.
I'm just sayin' man be careful, that chick has castration written all over her.
next time we drink: battle shots.
battle shots or battle shits? if its the first, explain. if its the second I think I figured it out.
it's like getting dryhumped by a chainsaw in the very best possible way
Is it acceptable to cry on a Friday or am I supposed to drink to forget it?
like i literally can feel my uterus getting frustrated at me for not being pregnant.
I just had the most intense bikini wax of my life, i felt like i needed guardrails
Ate his Chinese food and drank his beer and played with his chihuahua. All while wrapped in a towel while he was sleep.
We aren't doing Shrooms tonight bc that would be friendship cheating on you
Refresh my memory....were we forced to leave or did we choose to leave?
You can now call me Rabbi, and I can now perform weddings, funerals, and other services in all fifty states. You're welcome, world.
I looked into her soul, didn't I?
You eye-fucked her soul.
Randomize
