I have to look really hot tonight because my personality is going to suck.
on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
You just kept rubbing her head and repeating "I really like your head, I want your head..." over and over for like 10 minutes straight... And she didnt even stop you.
We decided I could make bicurious-jitos or ho-meh-jitos or heteroflexible-jitos. But not homojitos.
Odd question. Did you find a 20 in your boxers? I need it for gas.
also Jesus you really need to change your diet. I just washed your baby gravy out of my hair and it's so acidic my hair is damaged. You have killer sperm
We haven't been trashed enough to shut down a bar together in four days. I'm starting to worry that we're growing apart.
She has dubbed herself the Pied Piper of Penis and keeps yelling about getting Cocktober started... Will send pix soon
We just got home a lil bit ago. No sorority girls showed except the ugly swimmer chick and she asked if I've ever faked an orgasm.
I think I ripped my underwear last night doing drunk squats
when I called the strip club they said there was a note with my credit card. "girl who punched guy in throat" fuck daytona
How bad was it?
Stopped drinking Sunday, hungover on Tuesday bad.
The day I let him eat me out will be the day that Donald trump is an honest, kind, non-bigoted member of society
After we fucked we sat in bed and watched Charlie St. Cloud and he fed me ice cream. It was probably the most romantic thing I've ever done.
She's like a cask of Amontillado. Very tempting if I was drunk, but sober, I know I'll get fucked over in the end.
Randomize
