I just had one of those nervous system things in my thumb...I'm pretty sure I have cancer.
i was just at lovers lane looking for gifts for a bachelorette party.....with my mom
He's so far in the closet he's in Narnia
Everything we own is covered in grass and KY
Her life is proof that being a drunken slut will get you places.
Did you get your crutches off the street sign?
There was enough sluts here for 2 threesomes to happen at the same time, and you still struck out. What did you do to piss off karma so much?
Nothing like playing hide and seek with a state patrol officer early in the morning to get your heart rate up.
Well despite the fact that I'm still not entirely sure this isn't an elaborate/cunning plan to kill me, I'm in.
well it got awkwardly quiet so i looked up, slapped his stomach, said "youre the best!" while pointing at him, and went right back to sucking his dick.
I'll remember. Also, I owe you 200 for a pair of shoes that I carelessly bought to improve my spinal structure, to improve my health and ensure that I love to be 300 years old. Like Adam. Of the bible.
Oh, also as a concerning side note, my bra had drops of blood on it. So I don't know what the deal was, but someone I was around was definitely bleeding a decent amount.
We are the rockettes of vaginal bleeding
isnt it crazy how for years we were living our owns lives, and now only a wall seperates us?
stop. eating. my. shrooms.
Started dabbing in blow again because he always hated that I did it. Yuh I’m doing drugs but at least I’m doing me?
Randomize
