is it possible for your nipples to fall off? if so mine might. they hurt so bad...
I woke up at 4am on the couch with half my clothes on. And by half my clothes I mean my earrings.
So I fucked that hot french guy last night
You do know he's the one who threw up on our table, right? You get to clean it up.
She introduced herself as 'Ann the sober one.' Took me to a coat check and a lost and found. Then offered coffee and breakfast sandwiches. Turns out she's been paying her half of the electric bill running post-party operations.
Every once in a while you'd chuckle to yourself, and when I asked you what's so funny u replied "sometimes my toes tickle eachother"
Writing apology letters and leaving them on peoples doors for your actions is NOT what I want to be doing at 6am.
I am too hungover to address any of this right now, every time i move it feels like i'm being bitch slapped by the hand of God
He gave me a hug and said "He doesn't deserve you, Anna. Your boobs are great, and I'd fuck you anytime. Any. Place." I need a new 'gay' friend.
I told my dad my stomach hurt and he bet me ten bucks I couldn't throw up on command. He has no idea what I did last night and I got ten bucks.
My underwear are in the stairs so apparently I did take the dog out.
Lesson learned. No more vodka and toaster strudel
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
And you know what the worst part is? Because of him I can now relate to a goddamn Taylor Swift song. FUCK. MY. LIFE.
Just once, can I please come back to a room that doesn't smell like beer and cum?
I have been adopted by a clan of drunken skinny dipping tourists.
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