someone threw a dead crab at me
How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
you should just get pregnant. that way you don't need to decide on a career.
I love how its suddenly "not all about sex" now that he can't get it up
Straightened my pubes. My dick looks like John Lennon fucked Gonzo.
Motor boating, judging by the amount of lipstick I found I would say between 6 to 8 times
the realtor just asked me if i've ever made meth on this property.... i need to do something about my hair
Dude, the chicks a procotolgy intern. Don't cheat on her. She knows where it hurts the most.
So your bra was hanging in the Christmas tree last night at some point I think
you told the taxi driver your yeast infection was so bad you wanted to F a popsicle
There's just something so liberating about drinking a beer with no pants on
He's two decades older than you. Remember how you said you wish you lived in the 70s? HE DID.
It is such a beautiful day to not be arrested
Lies! You took my virginity, and now my cigarettes!
Dude, I just turned down sexual favours because I need to study... What the fuck is wrong with me?
Randomize
