i freaking love being in a circle of guys. if i fart none of them suspect me.
you were licking his little sister's watercolors and trying to paint with your tongue.
I'm like 99% sure I made out with Kevin Spacey last night. Not good.
i had confetti in my bra
i still find it in random places like a shoe or my car. that week haunts me
Attempting to teach the cat how to shake. I need a job.
just fucked two guys in less than 12 hours. i miss this part of being single.
and by single i mean slutty
Here's my first problem: I'm drunk
We were kinda loud so his roommate woke up and to make up for it he invited him to a threesome. I can't drink whiskey anymore.
He wants me to tell you "my boner misses you"
In other news, I had my first sex related injury of the school year so that's cool
I just can't have sex in the car again. it's just too much
We were like one big happy Eskimo family.
She was wearing a grass skirt and a watermelon bra. WATERMELONS.
Not drinking until my bday. I know it's only a few days but it feels like when couples get celibate before the wedding and there's all that tension.
He casually compared computer science to childbirth and I was like "hey, as someone who has wanted to fuck you for six months now, could you please never talk about childbirth ever again"
Randomize
