Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
unlike you, ive never imagined darth vader masturbating
he told me he's been faithful to his girlfriend and is gonna try to stay that way. challenge accepted.
...and the foreplay consisted of me threatening to cut off his hand if he didn't remove it from my back.
You have proved your worthiness to join me on the quest of taking shots at every academic building on campus by showing up drunk to our test at 12:30 today
I don't remember much, but my night is dated pre-Jaeger and post-Jaeger. Also, my boss may or may not have tucked me in.
Turns out, his fucking is as lame and staggered as his NFL career.
he kept saying that we were in ian's fun time place and then continued to act like a dinosaur.
I think they're German
Just say lederhosen and see what happens
Grandpa got a dui while riding a horse. This is what I need to live up to.
Nothing like an alcohol-fueled, 6-hour-long hunt for weed--complete with occasional breaks for sex.
Hold your horses dude. Titty pics are a work of art.
I got inside last night via doggy door
The whole time you were apparently enduring your pukescapades, I was singing very loudly in the car to Beyonce on my way to get a post-coitus Diet Coke.
You ever fart so bad at work that you think about taking a sick day just to spare your coworkers from the savage olfactory beating they are about to receive?
Randomize
