Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
Just so you know, each of my boobs fits perfectly in a martini glass.
there's no toilet paper. I'm using wheat bread.
90% sure you snuck in there somewhere, all I really remember is big boobs in my face so I'm assuming it was you.
The birthday girl is bringing her own barf bucket, it is going to be a good weekend.
I'm not drinking anymore...and by that, I mean until St. Patrick's Day.
Well my ankle is fucked up, everytime it pops I have a reminder of $200. Jager bomb night and the day we began to rebuild our friendship.
Hi, my name is Ashslay and I'll be your designated shitshow.
Bring me your tired, your weary, your buffalo chicken dip
Based on the conversation I'm going to assume you didn't close the deal.
It started going awry when I fell through a roof.
I wrote notes to myself all over my body. "don't yell at cops again" "Cody stole your phone" "you kissed Cody" "vodka shots are bad for your liver" and "cactus pretty" WTF????
And pointless. I'm fully vested in all my calories coming from booze today. The salad just fucks that shit up
I THINK HE DOES. OMG!!!!! OMG I FUCKED A GUY W A FAKE LEG AND I DIDN'T EVEN KNOW!!!!!!????!!!!!!!!!
My favorite part was making you pull out your lucky steelers vibrator and show it to jerome bettis at the bar
How was it?
i think i smell bacon but im to sore to walk downstairs. that kinda night
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