she was using a pencil to fish crushed adderall out of a plastic bag. it was like a college version of fun dip
Turns out shot glasses hold the perfect serving of sour patch kids....I still fail to see how not having any real glasses is an issue
But you wanna know what the sadest part is? I had to smoke on the way back home cause my mom would be suspicious if I wasn't high after I was supposedly hanging out with you.
got my wristband ripped off, was told i can only be served water. please find me, i'll be running through the fountain
i just found this napkin with your number on it in my jacket pocket. it reads amy, drawing of a wine bottle and a house
My roommate says its rare that you can be tear gassed before you lose your virginity so i feel accomplished in life
but they dont look like handprints. looks like someone had a boxing match with my tits and my tits lost
in other news, i feel like i just shat out all my sins.
Come on there are only so many drink coaster sizes nipples in the world
Just peed out a window, not entirely sure it's open. Can't tell. I'll find out in the morning.
Is it weird that I noticed my lower half feels strange and then further realized it's bc I'm wearing underwear to bed for the first time in weeks..maybe months?
He has silky zebra print sheets, which you would think he put on just for me, but the bed was unmade. Did I just sleep with a closet case??
I smell like cowboy sweat. I got two lap dances. This is the best day of my life!
I don't think anything is more terrifying than the thought that you might shit your pants in front of your boss
I wrote life affirmations on my notes to repeat and read several times a day so I become a better person, see the time on the toilet has been constructive
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