Yup u can hook up with me now and not goto jail
Lets date for the summer
what?
Dont love me in September.
the real housewives of new jersey finale is tonight. it makes me wish we had pot.
GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007.
Wtf it's a Friday night?
PRIORITIZE.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well i just set every background of each phone in the verizon store to my face
Does slim fast make a chocolate heart for valentines? If so that's what she's getting.
Day 3 of Lent and I would already kill a puppy if God would give me permission to masturbate
This dude was wearing a "Plan B- One Step" backpack. I wonder how many more I have to buy until I get mine??
You were demanding water from a bottle but I didn't have one..so I just took the water bottle from the hamster cage. You're welcome.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Both his mom and his sister were hitting on me when I stopped by today. He isn't a real friend anyway, right?
He hasn't left the hospital without a nurse's number all year. My nurses are always ugly or men. Wtf bro
I just contemplated drinking cheese dip. And by "contemplated," I mean "attempted and was forcibly stopped from."
All I'm saying is that any 24 year old guy who sends me a snapchat from the vantage point of his dick with the caption "hiding behind my weiner" is off my list potentially dateable guys.
You told the entire smokers deck that you were blowing .08 now and anyone else willing later
How are you feeling?
I mean, shattered dignity aside, not bad.
Randomize