It's like God shit irony all over that family
ran into someone who graduated hs with us while i was paying for booze in quarters. i love it when people from my past catch me in my classier moments.
I'm drunk in class and I'm pretty sure the bible freak behind me is saying a prayer for me
You only ask me to come over when your gf is gone, and thats usually at midnight to cook chicken salad and watch you pass out
party gras won. party gras always wins.
You left your underwear here. I'm hanging it on my door
WHY. COME BACK. TRAPPED WITH ROOMMATE AND FALCON. SAVE ME. I HAVE HUMMUS.
laying naked on couch sucking water through straw. i can still feel the orgasm from last night. thank you mdma.
It's a lost cause. Soon she's gonna get naked, just let nature run its course
You said you'd make me a thank you card for taking care of your drunk ass. I'll be expecting that monday.
Oh dude I know. When something that's supposed stop pregnancies taste like chocolate something's up
Well we had to pull over on a side street in town so I could throw up while moms were driving by with car loads of kids, I feel like I just performed a lil silent AA film for the childrens
No worries, I've prioritized my homework into "can do drunk" and "should be sober" categories. We're good.
ya I had reallllllly good sex last night too that will probably get me evicted
its 2pm and were already starting beer pong...its gonna be a good night
Randomize
