No I remember falling down the stairs I just don't remember it hurting.
win or lose for butler, i'm still masturbating to brad stevens tonight
Nope. Can't afford girlfriends. Still looking for the 25 year old bisexual tripled who owns a brewery or a casino.. the search continues....
Just interrupted a freshman tour to ask where the sexual health center is. Figured I'd just give us all what we were really looking for.
We invited our waitress tonight to come too.... we told her she had lightning in her veins and in return she taught us a Texas Roadhouse dance so the logical next step was invite her to a kegger.
I keep telling myself that if Britney can make it through 2007, I can make it through this date.
How is it that I've hooked up with not one but two guys in the children's section of a bookstore tonight?
Reminder: You could have had sex with me while wearing a tiara.
Will you be super villain lesbian lovers with me for halloween?
I love that you'd blow off your high school reunion to get shit faced in an aquarium with us
Um. We all know how I feel about sea life
Come over. And we'll put iced coffee in the bong.
I've got a surprise in the fridge when you get back.
Is it a puppy?
So your telling me I can lick your ass but you CAN'T spend my money
I know! It's like he knows when my vagina wants to misbehave!
Want to help me interview candidates to replace my Cub/Boy Toy when he leaves for grad school next month?
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