Tell him to shut up cuz i said so. I lost my dollar shoe :(
Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
Is making out on a toilet while he is sitting down and pissing weird? cause that's what happened last night
I thought about donating plasma but thats not the way i want to find out that i have aids
i slept with him so i could steal the screens out of his sink faucets for my bowl when he went to sleep. not because he's funny.
I'm kind of concerned that there are now two different videos of me with knives
he left his wallet here so lets treat ourselves to a lunch for the lack of penis we both had deal with
My three rules on what I'm wearing tonight. Something short, something see through, and something i had sex in.
my sober ride is dancing w/ a fat girl. i might be awhile
My booty call just put me down for a reference for her job at the hospital. What am I supposed to say? She gives great bj's?
he's like a horny 3rd grader on cocaine. he needs a leash
Are you feeling better yet?
I need a nap and a new butthole
I forgot wine drunk hurts
I keep worrying the police are going to come looking for us.
For which one? Starting a fire on my porch or having sex on my porch?
people keep driving by and judging me for drinking natty outside in my underwear at 9 am. rude.
Randomize
