based on who turned up here tonight the whole evening should just be called "mistakes i made when i was fat"
Just heard the new 'We are the world' ... Can I get my 10 bucks for Haiti back?
The fact that he is from Canada is way more embarrassing than the fact that you met him on match.com
Her boyfriend was hitting on other girls while drunk. But, she said she was okay with it because she is a feminist and she supports all women's decisions.
be proud. or at least amused. an 18 yr old and a 25 yr old at least makes my average hookup age this week the same as my age.
Hes drunk and dancing naked. I can hear his dick smacking his legs from the next room.
Neil John just started open mouth kissing everyone to make sure they are safe.
You tried to impress her by kicking the 5th floor button in the elevator, but you ended up kicking everything from 3 to 11. Then you said, "pretty accurate, huh ladies?"
The sun and I are not on speaking terms this morning
Lmao I should put that ad on Craigslist "in need of muscular and determined team of men to carry drunken birthday whore safely home"
I think he's holding my wallet hostage because I puked in his car. It's not my fault he has child locks on his windows..
Dougie got over his pride nerves. Found him dancing on a float wearing nothing but rainbow boxers.
How old am I that I had to sneak a boy out of my room this morning...
Please tell me I did not drink enough whiskey to think that having sex with my boyfriend while his best friend was on the floor next to us was a good idea.
Validation I posted a good pic? The lonely fuckboys send out the booty call signal. Of course I answered the call; Gotham needs its hero.
Randomize
