And if you don't call me, I will embarrass you publicly with a can of spray cheez.
we ike ciroccccc we love patroneeeee shost shothosthsothosthostsssss veryboyddddyyyy
go home
I just spent all my babysitting money on red cups and beer.
People still let you watch their kids?
Got kicked out of the baseball game with a 4 officer escort. Not bad for a monday night.
We are lost. Everyone is drunk and it all went downhill after we iced the bus driver.
I made a tournament bracket for the girls that Im talking with.
Do you remember calling me and dedicating a shot to me?
She poured a bottle of rum in the champagne fountain, did like 5 jello shots at the same time, then lit herself on fire. Twice. This is how everyone should turn 21.
If you're wondering about the pepper everywhere its for the ants and it was my doings. They hate pepper. You're welcome.
First memory of my senior year: Going into registration still drunk from last night.
I know you all think its cute to drop me off in a different state when I black out, but I can't wake up in family campgrounds asking where I am. These parents are scared.
I think if wine wasn't a thing I'd give up on life.
I'm gonna adopt her diet plan of secretly sleeping w a desperate ex... It combines excersise & loss of appetite due to guilt
I showed up drunk and covered in glitter, smelling like stale booze and dirty stripper and my younger brother gave thanks his life wasn’t a shitshow like mine
That’s how my thanksgiving went
fell asleep while jerking off ln. woke up to my hand in my pants and my cat crawling all over me
Randomize
