i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
My financial aid advisors would be so pissed if they knew I was spending my loan money on strippers
you were fixing your hair in the bathroom mirror and then fell backwards through the locked stall while she was in mid pee and fell on her lap.
Was that not clear on Friday when I nearly deapthroated two ice cubes?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You couldn't find your shoe so you introduced yourself as Cinderella for the rest of the night.
Ahh that explains the text from creepy mike saying he would be my prince charming.
This is actually a pretty big deal for him. I mean, he contacted a stranger out of concern for someone else instead of for sex.
That does show growth.
I made a wizard staff out of Keystone light... I am therefore the smoothest wizard in all of our university's history.
That's the last time I get in a car with six rappers headed to god knows where.
The fact that I took a nap during my midterm shows exactly how I handle being an adult
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So, what my linguistics project should really be called is "I happen to sleep/makeout with a lot of bilinguals and am now using them to help me graduate"
No way hahaha I have zero intention of adding him I wanna just join in on a three some but mostly just be there for moral support and snacks
SHE POOPED THE CONDOM WHOLE
you tried to drunkinly do the backflip kick off of karate kid and broke the big screen
It was bad. U were calling my cat "kittiano" and playing her like a piano. Way too drunk my friend.
So I just accidentally joined a bar crawl and got a free shotski of Jameson. I love life.
Randomize