But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
from now on my penis is your penis
I asked my mother if she peed on that chair, she said "not bad" There is no good level of pee on a chair.
my roomates packed me a lunch. it had bread, cheesewiz, a can of refried beans and a condom with a note that said "good luck on your first day". im not even gonna pretend to be mad.
It started out just like any other night: was watching a Zach Effron movie, drinking tequila out of a water bottle. I don't understand how this got out of hand.
I'm having Vietnam flashbacks. This Kid I hooked up with is speaking in class and I keep experiencing the terror.
Singing high school musical songs with an old Russian woman I met on the bus. What are you doing?
i feel like there is just so much pressure to sex him up, its like the weight of the world is on my vagina.
From what I can tell at a cursory glance, it seems that last night I fell asleep on string cheese and it melted into my bra.
I can't believe you picked a finger in the ass over lunch with me.
We need a full length mirror. I just ate it trying to look at my shoes on the toilet. But aside from a arm bruise I'm good to go
I told him I was going to sit on his face after I got out of the shower, he threw up the arm boners and yelled "STEVE HOLT!!" I might actually stop sleeping with other dudes.
She just asked me if I was going to stay the night. I responded "I know that we are upside down".
Like, yea, let's talk sexy but also...LOOK! I SAW A CAT!
He told me that I should keep my socks on next time because he read somewhere that it'll help me orgasm...
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