I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
i just threw up in a potted plant at home depot
i wanna anger bang this girl behind me at work. she never shuts up with her annoying voice. but her boobs are phenom.
And I kind of want to stare at skinny jonah hill like a weird zoo exhibit lol.
he forgot we were at my place and not his so he tried kicking me out of my own apartment by saying "so, you can go whenever you want...."
Please warn me if you ever end up in porn, cause I don't want to stumble across that on accident, okay?
The feeling are messing with the penis
Yeah I mean once a gun is being waved around, its probably a good time to leave the party
But the music was sooo good
If I had a dollar for every straight boy that questioned their sexuality because of me, I would live a comfortable middle-class life.
Well you busted in the house and yelled with pride about Uber giving you a ride over with your new bong.
Just sitting in the tub googling "how to remove sharpie from skin". You?
They need to eat meat, go down on me the first time, every time, and know how to pull my hair. And there's a height requirement for this ride
I'm armed with nothing but $4 lip gloss gum and my phone. Ready to take on the fucking world.
We were driving past a farm when he screamed at me to stop the car, then he jumped out and tried to ride a cow.
I love you. You know I enjoy the constant sex noises
Randomize
