I wish facebook had a fuck off button.
I don't apprectiate you insinuating that my breasts have a sort of bremuda triangle effect
but the lizard people decide everything anyway
This chick just checked into her walk of shame on Foursquare... I think I'm in love.
I've spent the last ten minutes rubbing glue sticks on the wall
I fed him jelly beans while he fingered me. Win, win situation.
Wtf. I just got invited to a threeway bj session in the bathroom at boiler. Lmao
How am I supposed to stop smoking pot when girl scout cookies are being sold.
we're a generation of lazy underachieving stoners and uncreative overachieving automatons. you're golden
He's wearing my bra and eating a breadstick while jumping on our bed.....
It's just great that Easter is on 4/20 this year. Now everyone can enjoy the Easter egg hunts. And being around my whole family.
It wasn't until I lost my earring that I realized "I've been here before". Turns out we fucked a year ago. We've decided to make it a tradition.
Idk... I'm not sure why anyone would use a flesh light in general. Let alone hook it up to a wifi device.
Sex was followed by homemade breadsticks. I waited till after the breadsticks were gone to tell her i had a gf.
I am going as Rudolph for the Christmas Eve furry orgie.
Is Santa taking the sleigh of slutty reindeer around the neighborhood again this year.
Yes. Several neighbors have requested it.
Randomize
