talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
I'm either too drunk or not bisexual anymore
Fell asleep in bio again. Sometimes i feel like college is just one really expensive nap.
i want to major in coloring with an emphasis on crayons.
so finals studying is going well?
He took the lighter and said "this is how I give myself a bikini wax."
His sombrero wouldn't fit in the car and I had to buy him some Jack to make him stop bitching. You owe me
What I love about college? The kid tripping balls has a kayak made readily available to him on any given Wednesday, Saturday, or Sunday.
they call him the transporter because he'll be your designated driver in exchange for sufficient weed or sex.\n
what about money
no - he has a code he lives by
I think my hopes are too high for this one. The only other bachelorette party I've been to I was felt up by a Chippendale's dancer and smoked a joint with the party bus driver.
We got really stoned and then we fucked. Then he made me a panini.
Oooh, he sounds pretty classy
Actually, not at all. We were stoned so he made me a peanut butter panini. With a Rollo in the middle of it. And he left the panini press on all night. I could have died.
Only Tommy would bring a stripper pole to a bonfire
You decided it was too difficult to walk down the stairs so you just rolled across his kitchen floor laughing like a maniac and trying to drink at the same time
On the flip side, we did almost have sex wearing a gorilla mask and deer antlers.............
This is my second month of college and all I've learned is how to get a guy to go down on me without asking out loud and not to chase everclear with Smirnoff ice.
Essential life skills
Will u make me a "6 month anniversary of being single" cake??? I wanna celebrate
Randomize
