three guys just busted into my bio lecture, yelled "happy st. patrick's day!", downed jagerbombs, and left.
I really shouldn't have to apologize. It was your own damn fault for opening a tab at the bar and telling me about it.
the room spins SO much faster in panama
Its people like u that make people like me go to rehab. He has a lazy eye for christ sakes.
I vaguely remember hanging my bra off the ceiling fan and chugging a beer during sex
College has turned you into quite the multi tasker huh?
Awkward sister question: which game of thrones female left would you fuck?
AND WHAT FELONIES DID I MISS OUT ON WHILE SLUMBERING!?
I accidentally sent him a snapchat of my boobs and now we're going on a date tomorrow... Could be worse.
Note to self. The tub labelled "not water" does not contain water.
You're the second person to offer to fuck me in the bathroom at work. Idk whether I should feel honored, or if cvs is just a turn on.
Unless he's under 18, in which case you put him back where you found him this instant.
I just accidentally deep throated a popsicle in front of my parents
Just watched a middle age white woman scream WHY DON'T YOU GO FUCK YOURSELF, HELEN?! Helen seemed absolutely scandalized.
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
He made me ask permission to to cum and it made me cum.
Randomize
