if creeping was an olympic sport, i would be a lock for the gold right now.
She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
And by the way, how is me getting head even remotely comparable to you fucking 3 guys?
history professor just told us he has magic fingers. i'm going for it.
know what the best part about malls are? standing on the upper level and boob gazing
Turns out I wasn't throwing up blood, I just threw up so hard it ripped my tonsils. Thank you Jameson.
I made out with him with my retainers in. My drunken hook-ups get lazier and lazier.
It's amazing how many friends she makes simply by carrying that flask of whiskey everywhere she goes.
He left his shoes, boxers and socks at my house & managed to walk home to his dorm without realizing anything was missing until 3 days after. That's the last time i'll ever hook up with a freshman.
I think this girl gave me a handjob thinking that I would help her with her cell phone bill
omg. that's awesome
I've got beer and a bag of saltwater taffy and croutons, is that enough for this typhoon thing?
A black suburban rolled up and a scary suited guy got out the passenger side and opened the door for her as she got in. Then drive off. Who did I just fuck?
I'm too old for chlamydia. That's for 20 year olds who go to clubs and do drugs I've never heard of.
Whatever. I have his dick. Haha how many girls can say they have a dildo replica of a guy they were seeing
I'm currently watching porn and playing beer pong with wine in the lobby of a hotel with a squadron of hot airforce guys. You can never say your life is better than mine again
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