If you text me again I will gut all of your stuffed animals.
Can you really blame Steve Phillips? He went to Michigan. Plowing fat girls is a 100-level course there.
I had sex with billy mayes last night. HE KEPT IN CHARACTER THE WHOLE TIME.
it was a sick party until you insisted on putting on "that's how I beat shaq"
From what I remember, he had one ball. But it was cute
naw. unless you want me to sit in a corner, not understand english and eat all of your cheese then i don't think it's a good idea.
In the future let's not drunk dive in the fountain in front of the hotel bar.
All I remember from last night is petting the broom with my feet and feeling like I was standing on a horses head
The couch is in the bathroom. I don't understand how that is even possible. I couldnt even fit that shelf thingy through the door. Come help. I am about to pee my pants.
Friend date it is then. Question: Can friends engage in sexual activities after dates?
nothing like walking in the house at 3 am in my panties and a sheer shirt carrying a life sized cardboard dale earnhardt jr
Watching him and my sister argue over a rum and coke about who's going to chop the coffee table in half with a hatchet...
Sorry, but when you makeout with a guy in a panda suit, you know something has to change.
I was blacked out when we met, so basically this will be a blind date.
I don't have any soul left to be crushed.
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