It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
i just made out with my boyfriends father...and so did jess
I just had a girl text me from knoxville "come see me. we'll go for drinks and I can make you breakfast"
how do you like your eggs?
over tits
I wonder if that one guy remembers you sticking salami to his forehead when he was passed out on new years eve.
Look, as a friend I'm asking to see a picture of his tiny dick
We had fun with our Indiana Jones role-playing until I whipped myself in the dick with my belt.
I need to find out this kids work schedule. I need mustache rides on my lunchbreaks.
What the hell do you have that is more important than a GIANT WATER SLIDE?
I mean, it's just pathetic when the standard is tinder and he can't live up to it.
I nicknamed her "Jackhammer" for the way she gave me a handjob. My balls were in constant pain
Are you done yet? I've eaten three corndogs so I'm ready 2 party.
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
...okay, you can't just say 'masturbating llama' and not explain yourself
Dear Ex-Sister-in-Law, I never thought I would say this, but I just found your panties in my back seat. Please remind me to give them back.
Just let a guy I just met eat me out in a shed at a baby shower. May have sunk to a brand new low
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